It’s Totally Normal to Want & Crave More Than Motherhood
It's sold as everything you should ever want. But what if it isn't?
“Motherhood is often portrayed by the media as so one-dimensional," Shama Hyder, the CEO of Zen Media and new mom, told
in their 2020 interview.She knows media—she’s deep in it—and yet still, motherhood surprised her.
"I didn't hear anyone tell me, 'You know what? It's totally fine to have help. Totally fine to keep doing your business.'" You don’t have to give up who you are completely in the journey into parenting.
For Shama Hyder, she planned to take maternity leave and time off, and then she waited for that mythical love of motherhood to arrive and sweep her off her feet. Like she’d been told. But that wasn’t the reality for her.
Her truth? "We slogged through it," she said about those first few months. "And breastfeeding was HARD."
"I felt so much guilt for it," she shared about becoming a first-time mom. "I was like, ‘Why can't I be stronger, better, able to do more? Why do I need so much help?’"
These are the myths and lies about motherhood—that it should be easy, come naturally, be seamless, and be effortless. For many women and parents, however, it’s not this way. While some parts of motherhood may be absolutely beyond wonderful, other parts can be deep, hard, and unbelievably challenging labor.
If you’re challenged by the motherhood myths, take a listen to Episode #219, where Sarah and Shama take a deep-dive into the myths about motherhood.
“I needed so much more than motherhood.”
The thing about the way motherhood and “momlife” is portrayed is that you're supposed to want it completely and fully, and it's supposed to be fulfilling all by itself.
But what if it isn't?
That's okay too.
It's totally normal to want and crave more than motherhood.
In the interview, Shama talks about how hard breastfeeding was for her, how she ended up sourcing milk for her kid from anywhere she could find it, and how she ended up going back to work right away.
When it came to work and her business, "I had so much creative energy," she said. "And motherhood doesn't fulfill it [for me]. I needed so much more than motherhood.”
"I just never heard my version of motherhood validated by anyone else," Shama shared on Episode 219 of The Startup Parent Podcast.
"I just want every mom out there—anyone who finds herself in the gray zone, to know that it's okay to want more."